I have a lot of decisions I have to make in the next few weeks. The major one is when I am going back to work. I know that they need me because of short staffed reasons, but there was 8 months in advance of notice of when I was going to be out lol...so then again, I don't need to rush myself. If I rush myself, that could lead into taking the healing process a lot longer than it should. Do I want the money? Yeah...who doesn't...but I also have to look out for my health.
The second decision is what I am going to do about a bigger car...we just can't fit everything of two kids into my car including : 2 adults, 2 children, 2 carseats, 2 diaper bags, 2 strollers...yadda yadda yadda...I think my decision on that is...I will get a new car as soon as I start working again, so that I can make sure we aren't struggling to make a car payment while I'm out of work. Then that leaves me with what kind of car I'm going to get...pretty sure it is going to be a ford...lol for the sake of the boyfriend! :)
The last decision I have to make is about living room furniture...There is a sectional at big lots that I like a lot and it's pretty cheap, but the color is not my favorite. Then there is the Ashley one at Factory Furniture that we like, but it's about 400 more than the one at big lots but a beautiful color and will fit our room better. So that leaves me with cheaper vs. more expensive. But with having two young kids, I kind of don't want to get anything really nice because of the simple fact that they will make messes...oh this decision is the most painstaking for me to make lol and to think it's really one of those that is not a big deal.
I have other things on my mind that I need to do, but those will come with time and a lot of praying and having a lot of faith! So, for right now, I need to keep my chin up about the issues that really worry me, and let them work themselves out on their own.
For now, my to do list is pretty short....
1. call my lawyer to proceed with the rest of the divorce
2. finish laundry so bobby will have work clothes and riley will have night night clothes
3. pull out something for dinner
4. steam clean rest of living room floor?!?! i think so...
So, I'm thinking that I need to go to Greenville Tech tomorrow and have my transcripts sent to Upstate so I can attend in the fall. I tried it once before, but they sent me a check back to my house for the amount I paid to have my transcripts sent...BOO...so now I'm going to try again. Even though it really is a pain in my butt!
I also have to decide what I'm going to do about school in the summer. I want to take anatomy in the summer at Greenville Tech, but I have to see if they offer it in the summer. Since the summer is fast tracked classes, I'm also scared to take such a hard class in the short time alloted.. I guess I will talk to my dad tomorrow and see what he says. I want to take some basic "medical" classes, because that will help open up my horizons for my career in the future. If I just limit myself to certain classes, I can only do certain jobs, but if I minor in something medical along with my psychology degree, that will give me a better job in the future.
It really is amazing at how things change in your life. Bobby's mom really got me thinking into this. In the past 3 years, I have changed my life for the better not only for me, but for my children as well. I am closing a chapter in my life that was really negative, and the only thing that is keeping me from doing so right now is a court date. I'm working on fixing myself and getting all of the negativity out of my life, since my life is close to perfect now. There is no need to be negative when I have two amazing children and an amazing boyfriend who is ALWAYS there for me and will always love me. All I know is that 3 years ago, I would have never thought that I would be where I am right now: 2 children, the love of my life, an associates degree achieved, making the dean's list, getting accepted into a 4 year university, and having 2 amazing families watch me go through it all!!
Enough said for now...time to pick up and play house and maybe read some of my book! :)
Monday, March 28, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
One Week Old
Sheesh...where do I even begin? One week ago today, Charlotte Elizabeth Cook was born into our lives. She is so beautiful. I woke up like normal to make Bobby's lunch and I had these horrible pains, but they were not so so bad to the point where I thought it was time to go to the hospital. By 7 that morning, I knew something was not right. I tried taking a bath in case they were the braxton hicks...but that only helped for about 5 minutes. I called Bobby and we went to the hospital.
By the time I got to the room I had to pee in a cup and it sounded like a flood came out of me. My water did not break but because I was having a contraction, all the pee came at once. That was horrible. They kept me on the monitor for an hour and kept checking my cervix and I went from 3 to 5 cm so they decided I was in labor and admitted me.
They gave me an i.v. and then I got the epidural. I still can't believe how fast everything happened. I was thinking she would come by early evening, but a little over an hour after they broke my water they said it was time. The pushing part was a breeze and after about 4 to 5 minutes of pushing, she was here. She was 7lb 1 oz and 19 in long. After 40 weeks and 4 days my princess was finally here. It's ironic, because Riley was born after 40 weeks and 4 days as well.
Throughout the whole thing, Bobby was at my side. He helped me cut the umbilical cord which meant a lot to the both of us. He also helped clean her up and get her ready to be in my arms for the first time. He was amazing through out the whole thing. The whole car ride to the hospital he kept telling me to squeeze his hand when it hurt. He was such a great support partner and I am so glad that he could be there with me. I could not have chosen a better man to be mine. Every time a bad contraction hit, he would tell me that he was so sorry that I was in so much pain and that he wished he could take the pain away from me. He stayed by my side through everything, even when we had some unexpected "company" at the hospital. He really is the best man for me, Riley, and Charlea. I really do love him dearly.
I am so thankful that she is healthy, and did not have any problems like Riley did when he was born. No child deserves to suffer. I had a better pregnancy this time around for the most part, too. Granted, it started off rough, but when I met Bobby things made a 180 change for the best. I even have a stronger support system now. I know that during any time of the day or night, I can call on his family or mine and they will be there for me. Bobby's parents have taken me and Riley (and now Charlea) in and have given us a place in their heart that I will never forget. His mom and step dad have been there for me since they met me, and I could not be more thankful. When they found out I was going in labor, they were there as fast as they could be. His cousin, Josh, who I hung out with only once, was there for me and came to the hospital on his lunch break before I had her, and also visited us in our room. After I came home, his mom and step dad have come to the house and helped me out with the children, house work, and making sure I have enough rest. All I have to say is those who have been there for me have the biggest places in my heart. My family has also been a big help in everything lately. My mom makes sure that I have enough rest and she comes when she is not working in case I need a nap. I really could not be more thankful for the help that we are getting. I was so glad that my sister got to come up and be there for me, as well. She helped my mom a lot with Riley, and also got to love on her new niece too.
Today was the first day that I have been left alone with both children by myself. It has not been too bad, only because she is sleeping lots, and Riley plays on his own. I have been able to clean up the house a tiny bit, spend time with Charlea, and spend time with Riley. The hardest part, I would have to say, is when Riley has one of his fits because he did not get his way. He ended up going down early for his nap because he was throwing a tantrum. But that's the way the cookie crumbles. I'm not going to allow him to do it and get away with it.
Nights are a little rough at times only because I'm dying for some solid rest. I know that's impossible with a newborn, but I am also pretty lucky with Charlea. Most nights she goes 5 hours between feedings. The kicker is that she poops non-stop. Every single diaper she has changed, has poop in it. I'll feed her, lay her down and lay myself down, and then five minutes later, I'm up because she just pooped again. I feel so bad because her little bottom is getting so sore because of how often she poops. I change it as soon as I hear it or notice it, but it's hard to always catch it right as soon as it happens.
Time to do more laundry and hopefully lay down for a little bit!!
By the time I got to the room I had to pee in a cup and it sounded like a flood came out of me. My water did not break but because I was having a contraction, all the pee came at once. That was horrible. They kept me on the monitor for an hour and kept checking my cervix and I went from 3 to 5 cm so they decided I was in labor and admitted me.
They gave me an i.v. and then I got the epidural. I still can't believe how fast everything happened. I was thinking she would come by early evening, but a little over an hour after they broke my water they said it was time. The pushing part was a breeze and after about 4 to 5 minutes of pushing, she was here. She was 7lb 1 oz and 19 in long. After 40 weeks and 4 days my princess was finally here. It's ironic, because Riley was born after 40 weeks and 4 days as well.
Throughout the whole thing, Bobby was at my side. He helped me cut the umbilical cord which meant a lot to the both of us. He also helped clean her up and get her ready to be in my arms for the first time. He was amazing through out the whole thing. The whole car ride to the hospital he kept telling me to squeeze his hand when it hurt. He was such a great support partner and I am so glad that he could be there with me. I could not have chosen a better man to be mine. Every time a bad contraction hit, he would tell me that he was so sorry that I was in so much pain and that he wished he could take the pain away from me. He stayed by my side through everything, even when we had some unexpected "company" at the hospital. He really is the best man for me, Riley, and Charlea. I really do love him dearly.
I am so thankful that she is healthy, and did not have any problems like Riley did when he was born. No child deserves to suffer. I had a better pregnancy this time around for the most part, too. Granted, it started off rough, but when I met Bobby things made a 180 change for the best. I even have a stronger support system now. I know that during any time of the day or night, I can call on his family or mine and they will be there for me. Bobby's parents have taken me and Riley (and now Charlea) in and have given us a place in their heart that I will never forget. His mom and step dad have been there for me since they met me, and I could not be more thankful. When they found out I was going in labor, they were there as fast as they could be. His cousin, Josh, who I hung out with only once, was there for me and came to the hospital on his lunch break before I had her, and also visited us in our room. After I came home, his mom and step dad have come to the house and helped me out with the children, house work, and making sure I have enough rest. All I have to say is those who have been there for me have the biggest places in my heart. My family has also been a big help in everything lately. My mom makes sure that I have enough rest and she comes when she is not working in case I need a nap. I really could not be more thankful for the help that we are getting. I was so glad that my sister got to come up and be there for me, as well. She helped my mom a lot with Riley, and also got to love on her new niece too.
Today was the first day that I have been left alone with both children by myself. It has not been too bad, only because she is sleeping lots, and Riley plays on his own. I have been able to clean up the house a tiny bit, spend time with Charlea, and spend time with Riley. The hardest part, I would have to say, is when Riley has one of his fits because he did not get his way. He ended up going down early for his nap because he was throwing a tantrum. But that's the way the cookie crumbles. I'm not going to allow him to do it and get away with it.
Nights are a little rough at times only because I'm dying for some solid rest. I know that's impossible with a newborn, but I am also pretty lucky with Charlea. Most nights she goes 5 hours between feedings. The kicker is that she poops non-stop. Every single diaper she has changed, has poop in it. I'll feed her, lay her down and lay myself down, and then five minutes later, I'm up because she just pooped again. I feel so bad because her little bottom is getting so sore because of how often she poops. I change it as soon as I hear it or notice it, but it's hard to always catch it right as soon as it happens.
Time to do more laundry and hopefully lay down for a little bit!!
Friday, March 4, 2011
March 4...2 days left until the due date
Well, there is still a lot of today left, but Bobby and I were hoping that she would come today. It is his grandmother's birthday today, as well, and it would totally be a great birthday present for his grandmother...but if she does not come, that's okay too. We were just hoping...I went and saw his grandmother yesterday, and she was so excited about if the baby were to come today. She also felt my belly where Charlotte was sitting and the joy on her face just melted my heart. His grandparents really are great people, and I'm so thankful everyday to have them in my children's lives.
I only have 2 days left, and this past week I have not been as miserable as the past 2 months...which is awesome. My feet has swelled worse, but other than that, I have been able to have a little more energy and get more things done. I guess it's also the fact that it's only a few days left until my due date, so my spirits are higher than the past two months where I thought the misery would never end.
Bobby has been working hard on Charlea's nursery. It is SO beautiful. We could not have decorated any better. I can't wait to post pictures up for everyone to see. It is like a fairy tale in there. All he has to do is finish putting up the new bars in her closet, and we will finish putting everything away. Since it is Friday, maybe we can finish the closet together tonight. We shall see since Bobby has worked his butt off lately.
I go to the doctor in a few hours for my supposed last prenatal appointment before the baby comes. I wonder who all is going to be left in the class from 2 weeks ago and who has had their babies. I wonder what they are going to tell me since I have not had her. They will probably not set my induction up just in case, but another appointment and then discuss induction after that. All I know is that I am ready, so I am hoping that we can set up the induction or maybe I will go into labor before the doctors appointment... ha ha...yeah right! I also have to talk to the doctor about stopping work since it is so close. Granted, I hate missing out on the money, but I also have to watch out for not only my health, but the health of the baby. We shall see.
Riley has been a great big brother already. He knows what is his and what is sissy's toys. He will point or pick something up and say "this is sissy's" and then put it back. It really is so cute. He also kisses my belly and tells sissy that he loves her. I really can not wait to introduce them when she comes. She bought him some train pieces to go to his train set for her arrival. I hear it helps with the introduction to give the older sibling something from the younger sibling so Riley feels like he is not left out for the baby. I will miss my little man so much while I am in the hospital, but I know he will come see us lots.
Time to get up and get ready for the doctor, make Riley lunch, put Riley down, and clean a little before I have to leave. *crossing my fingers for today*
I only have 2 days left, and this past week I have not been as miserable as the past 2 months...which is awesome. My feet has swelled worse, but other than that, I have been able to have a little more energy and get more things done. I guess it's also the fact that it's only a few days left until my due date, so my spirits are higher than the past two months where I thought the misery would never end.
Bobby has been working hard on Charlea's nursery. It is SO beautiful. We could not have decorated any better. I can't wait to post pictures up for everyone to see. It is like a fairy tale in there. All he has to do is finish putting up the new bars in her closet, and we will finish putting everything away. Since it is Friday, maybe we can finish the closet together tonight. We shall see since Bobby has worked his butt off lately.
I go to the doctor in a few hours for my supposed last prenatal appointment before the baby comes. I wonder who all is going to be left in the class from 2 weeks ago and who has had their babies. I wonder what they are going to tell me since I have not had her. They will probably not set my induction up just in case, but another appointment and then discuss induction after that. All I know is that I am ready, so I am hoping that we can set up the induction or maybe I will go into labor before the doctors appointment... ha ha...yeah right! I also have to talk to the doctor about stopping work since it is so close. Granted, I hate missing out on the money, but I also have to watch out for not only my health, but the health of the baby. We shall see.
Riley has been a great big brother already. He knows what is his and what is sissy's toys. He will point or pick something up and say "this is sissy's" and then put it back. It really is so cute. He also kisses my belly and tells sissy that he loves her. I really can not wait to introduce them when she comes. She bought him some train pieces to go to his train set for her arrival. I hear it helps with the introduction to give the older sibling something from the younger sibling so Riley feels like he is not left out for the baby. I will miss my little man so much while I am in the hospital, but I know he will come see us lots.
Time to get up and get ready for the doctor, make Riley lunch, put Riley down, and clean a little before I have to leave. *crossing my fingers for today*
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